Why it is so hard to get back into broadcasting?

This question has been bothering me for nearly three years. That's how long it's been since I left my job at KWCH-TV in Wichita, KS. At first, I thought I'll never go back to it. Yet, for some reason or another my mind kind of drifts on coming back to it anyway possible. WHY? Probably, because I still have this chip on my shoulder of wanting to direct or be a techinical director for newscast or sporting event. I did some in college, but never for a commercial station. I'll admit the way I left was not the way I plan it. I get upset seeing people who were in the same position as I was and were moving up. Now, if they had few more years it wouldn't have bother me so much ( I still be upset, but not as badly) But, when a snot nose punk kid whose only been there six months moves from working camera operator to techincal director and you've been there for three years?.....I'm wondering what's going on? At the time, I didn't express my feelings how I felt so betrayed and yet at the same time I was kind of wondering what am I'm really doing here.

I did give my two weeks notice to them and a lot of my co-workers were kind of wondering if they was anything that could change my mind and stayed.....I told them the damage was already done. If there was anything that I would have changed is that I should have expressed my feelings to the Production Manager and told him my problems instead of being so silent and acting to much like whining little kid. I know that I can't change the past, but I can certainly try to do something about my future. So, why is so hard to get back into the business? Well, there are a number of factors. One, most of the equipment that I edit was analog. Now, it has gone digital. Two, college graduates you see more of them coming out and some of them will be getting their first taste of the business. Three, the positions that you are qualified for are few and far between. Most of these positions are usually part-time. Your drive.......ask yourself this question "How bad do you want it?" Then, finally ask the Lord this one important question "Lord is this where you really want me in my life?"

I normally don't usually put myself out like this especially in my blog, but this has been on my mind for a long time and I had to get it out.

Signed
Tim "pondering many questions" Crippen